Clearly NOT a Yellow Brick Road

I've discovered that blogging is about as random as journaling is for me. Looks like it's been almost four months since I've had something profound enough to share on my mind. Trust me, I use the term profound very loosely.

So how have YOU been? I've been wrestling with many things in my heart concerning the Lord lately. I wish I could tell you I'm coming to you with incredible insight and clarity and God has just laid my path out for me so clearly I feel like Dorothy on the yellow brick road. But, the God of heaven and earth is simply not that clear most of the time.

And it's in those times that I've found God does the coolest work. You see, I'm not a naturally patient person - ask my husband, kids or mother. But I doubt many of us are because we're so hopelessly human. I like to have my answers my way and right now, thank you very much. And it would be really helpful if you'd just wrap them all up in a neat little bow, so I can be sure to know exactly where to find them.

But God in His sovereignty has MUCH bigger plans. You see, before He ever formed the earth He knew you and me. He knew that I would prefer to not have to wait too long for an answer and that I would trust way more in my plan B than I did Him. So He's given me one opportunity after another to learn to trust Him more. And it's in those waiting times that He teaches me the lessons I remember most. God doesn't just grab a ladle of grace and serve all the grace we need for our entire lives on earth in one big bowl. He gives us little teaspoons at a time. Each day we must go to Him and ask for the grace, strength, peace, you fill in the blank to make it through that minute, hour and day. Then the next day, we get to petition Him one more time.

God does this for us and for His pleasure. He knew that if He gave me all I needed and said "here, child, now don't spend it all in one place" that I'd screw up in two major ways. Number one - I'd waste my portion before I ever made it to my last day. And number two - I would never seek God's face because I'd think I didn't need Him anymore. God desires relationship and because He made us in His image, we need relationship, too. Who better to have a close, intimate relationship with than the one who holds everything in His hands??

These are the thoughts that have been encouraging me lately, and I hope they encourage you, too, sweet child of the King! I'd love to hear your personal comments on how God has blessed you by simply wanting a relationship with you. Leave a comment below and be encouraged!

Change You can take to Heaven's Bank

Wow, where do I start? First, I'll start by saying God is Faithful. I've been traveling along my journey in quietness with Him over the past few months. Many small changes have occurred in my life that have amounted to bigger blessings with Him. Isn't it interesting how God is constantly shaping, molding, pruning and making us just a little bit more like Him every minute of the day? And let me tell you, I am no easy vessel to mold!

Since my last post, I've fallen more deeply in love with my second-born. A strong-willed child that was very hard for me to love the first two years of his life. I can almost hear the gasp exiting your mouth right now as you read that sentence. But how are we to let God heal us if we're not honest with Him? And how is He to use us to touch others if we're pretending everything's okay when, clearly, they are not? So, since I know without a doubt that there are other moms and dads who've struggled to love or even like a child, I come to you with painful honesty. And I'm here to tell you - you're not alone and God IS Faithful and True and will answer your cry for help. You need only ask Him.

It took me awhile to see all the wonderful qualities in my incredibly frustrating child. And I felt horribly guilty because I didn't just adore my own child like I was "supposed" to. (Funny how society is very quick to tell us what to do, but falls woefully short of solutions to accomplish those insurmountable tasks, isn't it?) I'll just set you free from that load of bondage right now. Guilt is a tool from the pit of hell and Satan will use it against you in a mighty way - if you let him. Yes, I said let him. Satan has no power over a believer that we haven't first given him. (2 Corinthians 10:2-5)

I prayed for the first two years of my little one's life for God to change him. I knew I couldn't deal with a child "like that" for the rest of my life. I knew I would end up in the psychiatric ward at the local hospital. But then, through a wonderful message by a faithful member of our church, God revealed something to me. My son wasn't changing and I was just beating my head against a wall for nothing. God had answered my prayers and I hadn't even noticed. The answer was "No, child - this is for your good." And it is. God is changing me. And I am learning to accept the things that aren't changing and get my strength from the Lord.

That's change you can count on! God NEVER lets you down.

How Mad are You?

This post will be more of a rant than an actual post, I'm afraid. Lately I have been seeing so many stories put forth by the media that, as a Christian, just plain MAKE ME MAD! How has the average Christian become so, well, average? We are called to go against the tide to stand up for our Lord. Yet, most frequently, there's absolutely no difference between a person who calls themselves a Christian and one who completely denies Christ - except for where they spend their Sunday mornings (in bed or at "church"). Most "churches" these days have no reflection of the picture of God's Church as laid out in Acts Chapter 2.

I confess, until recently, I was as guilty as the next hypocrite. I went to a building to "do church" and was completely clueless what God's design for His church actually was. I thought "doing stuff" for God showed my love for Him and if I could just serve enough, God would know how I felt about Him. Sadly, I was dead wrong - spiritually dead. And I was tired.

The prevailing message in Christianity today is about "service." But the arrow is being pointed at either serving the wrong way - or, probably more specifically - serving the wrong One. True service to our Lord is not something we do, it's something we are. We don't serve the Lord to get something from Him. He's not our genie in a bottle. We serve Him out of our sheer love and devotion to Him for who He is not what He's done.

Certainly, we should praise Him for the good in our lives. But if we never receive one more blessing, we should serve Him simply because He's Lord. Period. I am jealous for a fresh awakening of the Church today. The Bride needs to be ever ready for the Bridegroom. And we need to add as many to the Kingdom as possible on the way. I am utterly convicted to share Jesus more. Every interaction I have with another human is an opportunity to reflect Christ and witness to His Gospel. I wonder - how many opportunities have I wasted? Maybe instead of getting mad at the media, I could get mad at Satan (the real enemy) enough to do something about it. Like share the Gospel with a lost soul. What a revolutionary thought.

Head and Shoulders, Knees and Toes

My life has been reeling with activity the past few months. So I have grossly neglected my blog. Here's to new beginnings!

Lately, everywhere I turn I am presented with a message on prayer posture. So I thought I'd invite you to share in my conviction. :) There are many postures from which to choose when praying - standing, sitting, kneeling, lying face-down. There are also many things to do with your eyes. Close them, look down, look up. For me, it depends on the nature of the prayer how I present myself before the Almighty Throne.

I might sit with another brother or sister, holding hands or with my hand on their shoulder, head bowed, eyes closed for intercessory matters. I might kneel for burdensome matters that are heavy on my heart, bowed head and closed eyes. Sometimes the bowing needs to take place at an altar so you can leave the matter there symbolically. (There's just nothing like a sweet time at the altar, is there?) There are times when it's appropriate to stand, hands raised, with open eyes in praise and adoration, unashamed and expecting the Lord's presence.

Then, there are times when no prayer posture will do but to lie flat on the floor, face-down and REALLY do business with the Lord. Sometimes we simply cannot humble ourselves enough to make the particular request we wish to make. Or sometimes we need such a healing or cleansing from Jehovah that we must prostrate ourselves to avoid distraction and pride.

No matter your posture, prayer is key to a healthy relationship with the Father. All these postures represent a heart condition and all of them are needed. So often in my Faith Walk I have neglected to kneel or lie down out of laziness or pride. And in those times when I know my Father is leading me to take a specific position, yet I refuse, I also know I have missed the great blessing God was holding out for me. Did it change the effectiveness of my prayer? Perhaps. Perhaps not. But I know in my heart I could have received more from the Lord should I have obeyed Him in such a simple thing as my prayer posture.

I love the Lord with all my heart. I want the absolute best He has to offer me. Oh, that I might not get in His way with my pride or neglect. I'm not suggesting we be legalistic and have a planned position for each type of prayer we speak. But I am imploring you to walk closely enough with the Lord to hear Him whisper to you "Darlin' you need to bow right here" or "Child, fall on your face about this one."

What about you, saint? Have you missed an opportunity to honor your Lord with your prayer posture? It's certainly something I've been mulling over this week. Be blessed, sweet one!

Service from the Heart

As I continue to read through the book I mentioned in my last entry, "Fresh Power", I find more and more to equip me for my new service in church leadership. We have recently started attending a very small, very intriguing church. My husband and I felt a definite call to leave our comfort zone of a large, well-established church with all the programs and activities one could ever want. We felt God was calling us to a place with very little to offer us. Instead of seeking to have our needs met, we are seeking to fill empty places in a church that needs us . . . desperately.

God called every believer to service. We are all to find a place within our churches, buckle down, and serve. Period. Regardless of whether our needs are met (only God truly knows what we actually need anyway), our feelings get hurt, or we "feel like it." (Which can entail a myriad of objections in itself). So why is it the modern western culture (read: United States) attitude to seek out a church for what it can do for me? I wonder how many of us are actually reading our Bibles? Because if we were, we would know that Jesus came to serve not to be served (Mark Chapter 10). Aren't we then, as followers of Christ, supposed to follow in His footsteps and serve? How can we justify such selfishness?

Allow me to share a few excerpts from this incredible book I am studying: "But just as there are people who watch from the bleachers and never know the challenge on the court, we have millions of churchgoers who sit in pews every week without entering the game." Later in the chapter, Pastor Cymbala goes on to say of the leaders of the Antioch church "These men were not sitting in a boardroom making strategic charts on a whiteboard. They were not huddled around their computers working on spreadsheets. Instead, they were having a time of worship, praise and prayer, all intensified by periods of fasting." Then he goes on to describe what I heard a good friend recently call a "Martha" type church (compared to a "Mary" type). "... if we are always busy working, doing, talking, handing out materials, and fielding phone calls, we miss the chances to listen and get our ears tuned to his voice. These men in Antioch quieted down enough to hear something from heaven. Samuel Chadwick said in the early 1900s, 'The church that multiplies committees and neglects prayer may be fussy, noisy, enterprising, but it labors in vain and spends its strength for naught. It is possible to excel in mechanics and fail in dynamics. There is an abundance of machinery; what is wanting is power.' "

Where has the power gone in our churches today? May I suggest to you that the power is within the people. It is called the Holy Spirit. But we're too busy, prideful and selfish to even realize our power source is completely cut off by our slothfulness and selfishness. I'm not sure about you, but I'm weary of the "me first" mentality in today's Christian culture. What happened to "God first" ? Brothers and sisters, I'm certain, based on authority of Scripture, that when our priority comes back to balance - God first - we will see revival in our nation. But it has to start within each believer's heart.

Saint, please know, that when I ask you this, I am including myself - where is God in your heart? This is a question I must ask myself daily. I hope you will too.

Unity = Effective Christianity

Over the past few years, I have been so burdened for unity in the Body of Christ that I can hardly contain it. I'm reading an excellent book right now that, coupled with my personal Bible reading, is making me even more jealous for the unity to which we are called. The book is "Fresh Power" by Jim Cymbala. This is the fourth book I've read by this particular author and each one has challenged me and encouraged me in ways I never imagined a book could.

Yesterday, as I studied Colossians, it paralleled and magnified some things I was reading in the book. In an effort to bring this subject to light in the name of Jesus, I want to share with you what I am learning.

In Colossians 3:13, we read "Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as memebers of one body you were called to peace. " A little earlier, in verse 11, Paul states "Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all." (emphasis added in both quotes). The Lord is clearly telling us to leave all pretenses, prejudices and preferences in the Name of Jesus to work together as one body for His Kingdom. God is not concerned with the name on the door of your church building or the number of people attending. He is concerned with the Holy Spirit filling each person in His body across the nations so we have the Power to do His work, unified, with one goal - to reach people - both the lost and believers in need of restoration and encouragement - and change their lives in Jesus' name!

Brothers and Sisters, unify, for Christ's sake!! Have a loving attitude and a heart for people. See them through Jesus' eyes. Status, race, denomination, wealth, poverty, talent - God is the giver of those gifts and He only sees a heart - not a color, pocketbook or skill. We will never be blessed with the fullness of the Holy Spirit in our corporate gatherings with division and strife. In the aforementioned book, Pastor Cymbala says it this way "We are busy expending energy to move ahead, but we go nowhere in the end. At the same time that we beckon the Spirit to 'come' through our praying and preaching, our slander, backbiting and division yell at him to 'go away'. "

Do we want to be effective for Christ or do we want to merely plod along in the same mediocre existence we are currently experiencing? I'm not sure about you, but I want to hold hands with my Brothers and Sisters and kick Satan not only to the curb, but to the darkness in which he belongs. In order to bind him up and start becoming more effective as a Body, we must unify. Satan's first attempt to destroy us is to keep us from becoming a child of the King. When that fails, he uses every force of darkness he can to create ineffective witness for Christ so that no one else is influenced positively enough by us to want what we have. This is the current climate of Christianity today. Such ineffectiveness that the world looks at us and says "why do I want that - they're no different than me?" Is that really the impression of Christianity we want displayed?

Not me! Arm yourself with the full armor of God with me. Put your work boots on and let's get a little dirty for the Kingdom's sake! Look at your fellow believers regardless of denomination, race or status - regardless of how they look, smell or speak - and say "Let's do this thing for Jesus' sake!!" That's effective Christianity. And it's a pleasing offering to our Lord and King.

The Greatest Power

I'm on vacation right now and there's really no better time to take a few minutes to write than when you're in the presence of the Almighty and His creation like I am today. I am at the beach and I never feel more close to God than I do when I'm looking at His ocean. What a magnificent display of His glory and power! The ocean is a complex machine. It holds the potential to ignite romance, inspire worship and soothe. But the same ocean has the power to smooth hard surfaces, erode beaches and destroy entire cities. But aren't we thankful that the ocean can do nothing without the direct consent of its Creator? Much like us. And, Praise God, very much like our enemy the Devil!!

Think about it! For all your struggles with Satan, remember, he is not allowed to touch one hair on your precious head without the direct consent of God. NOTHING happens without God allowing it!! If you are struggling in a battle with the greatest enemy, remember this. God has a work to do in you, precious one. And Satan is being used of God to complete that work. Wonder what the "father of all lies" would think of that one? Believer, he knows! Rest assured, Satan might have a big head, but even he knows that God is God and there is none like him. His agenda is to take as many humans down with him as possible.

Be encouraged, saint! Stand up and fight the fight on the winning side, then rejoice with your Commander - God Himself. There is no greater power.